The
10 Values I Have Learnt from Afghanistan
David
Raj SJ
Today
the word ''Afghanistan'' conjures up the images of terrorism, political
turmoil, chaos, roadside bombs, suicide bombers, blasts, violence, narcotics...
To most people around the world, Afghanistan is a country which is terribly
embroiled in war, a country they would probably never want to visit, and a
country they feel pity for. However, this country has not always been about war
and violence. It has an amazingly rich and glorious history, culture,
literature, historical places and monuments, incredibly beautiful nature, with
mountains, riverbeds, valleys, springs of water, deserts, forests, and of
course very kind and beautiful people with big hearts. When it comes to
counting the things, they are numerous!
I am inspired by 10 precious values that I have learnt from this
country, and these make me feel a sense
of deep satisfaction for all that I have learnt during my two years in the
country.
Praying
five times a day
It
is something unique in Islamic countries. When I look at the people, no matter
where they are, they stop to pray five times a day - on time. They just spread
their prayer carpet, wherever they feel comfortable (even in the crowded
place), and start praying. Whenever I see them praying, my mind too is
automatically moved to seek the Divine presence. I am really inspired by the
youngsters praying on the play-grounds, entertainment centers, and academic
institutes. Through their deep commitment to prayer, I feel called to persevere
in seeking the Divine presence throughout my day. This is very much in keeping with what we
have drawn from the Jewish tradition, but I feel drawn to deepen my resolve to
follow it.
People with a Positive Spirit -
Joint family system
Despite
the fact that there have been thirty years of constant conflict in Afghanistan,
during which the majority have suffered loss of loved ones, homes, or all their
properties, they always seem to be hopeful and happy. No matter how disturbed they
may be, physically, mentally or spiritually, they always manage to have a smile
on their faces. As a wise saying goes: ''A smile on my face does not mean that
everything is okay in my life. It means that I have the ability and courage to
deal with my problems.” The Afghans have that resilient power and spirit to
deal with the problems in their lives. Even considering the current situation
of Afghanistan, where neither their future security nor their life is ensured,
they continue to live happily, hopefully and normally, as if all is well. The
secret of their abiding optimism and their positive attitude in life is the
joint family system.
Afghans
live in joint families. There exists a very strong, almost unbreakable, bond
between all the family members, specially the children and the parents. This
bond is the healing balm of the wounds of all their bitter experiences through
the past decades. I always wonder how, in spite of all their challenges, the
people are very happy and celebrate their lives. The unity in the family is one
of the main reasons that restores their happiness and makes them forget all the
bitter experiences of the past. If this unity in the family were missing, I am
sure many more would suffer intense mental trauma due to the continuous conflict
situation and pressure.
We
are universally united
The
greatest consolation that I have experienced in this insecure country is the
support and solidarity with Jesuits in South Asia, and all over the world. The
number of emails and phone calls asking how we are, whether we are safe, or if
any help was needed, and responding at once, is witness to this. We are really
grateful to all who reach out to us in love, prayer and support from various
parts of the world. We acknowledge with deep gratitude all that so many have
done to lift up our hearts and strengthen our hands in reaching out in loving
service in “unity of hearts and minds”.
Hospitality
It is a key element of their culture and is viewed as a religious
obligation. Hence, Afghan hospitality is well known the world over. Afghans are
very friendly and love to welcome guests with open hearts and with respect,
because they consider them friends of God, serving them as best as they
possibly could. As a matter of fact,
guests are always welcomed to families at any time, even without prior notice.
Thus, if a guest comes without notice, the families do all they can to cook the
best meal in welcome. Not only cooking the best food, but also, as a part of
Afghan culture, guests are usually asked to sample several different dishes in
order to make them feel comfortable and at home.
Local Collaboration
The most beautiful aspect of our initiatives to reach out in an
effective manner is having strong local collaboration. Though we have language
barriers and few Jesuits, our local Afghan team stands with us as the
foundation stone of our outreaches, sharing our vision and goals. It is the
right time for us to exchange views with our local staff, and see how best we
can carry out our plans together more effectively. I strongly feel that in the
near future, without local collaboration, it will be very difficult for us to
serve the people, either in Afghanistan or any part of the world.
The
Growing Desire for Education
I have been teaching in
the local University for a couple of years. It has been the best time of my
life, being with the youngsters and sharing knowledge. Unfortunately, Afghanistan is among those
countries that has the lowest percentage of literacy. It is quite clear that
education brings reformation in chaotic societies, and it is through education
that a society says ‘NO’ to injustice, violence and all types of cruelty. Over
the past years, some part of the local population has realized this fact to
some extent. Many conservative families, that did not permit their daughters to
go to school earlier, are not only letting them go now, but also providing them
with moral support and encouragement. It gives me great happiness to know that
most of my students are eager to get an education, and that their perspectives are broadening
with a growing desire for knowledge day by day. However, it cannot be denied
that many still live with their old mindsets. It IS a good start anyway, and
maybe the day will come when the new generation, with the power of knowledge
and education, brings peace and stability to the country.
Respecting
the elders and fellow men and women with polite gestures
It is a community that
respects their elders very much. I have personally gained many insights and
values through their behavior and attitude. The respect that the sons and
daughters give to the elders of the family is enormous. When you enter a home
or a hall for a ceremony or a meeting, everyone stands to welcome you with the
greeting ‘Salaam’, and shakes your hand,
keeping the right hand on the chest while bowing slightly. We reciprocate with
the same gestures, looking at each
person and exchanging our greetings. It almost takes a minute to wish each one
personally. It does make me feel at home with the people and the place wherever
I go to attend any function or a meeting.
We
depend totally on God and on our Companions
It is as clear as a
crystal to me that I rely totally on the mercy of God for a safe life, and
fully depend on my companions for moral support. To get any help, it is my
community that I first turn to. This may not always happen in places where we
have been well established and settled. On the other hand, living here, very
much like the common people, without much security, community life is very much
stronger, and we have more time to share, to spend with each other, and to walk
together. This is my personal experience, and it has made me feel more humane.
Freedom
with responsibility
The freedom and
responsibility given to each young Jesuit is tremendous. I am personally
grateful for the great trust placed in me, and support that I have received to
take the lead in our local outreaches. Of course, we are accompanied and
guided, but the most beautiful concept of our service here is that we share the
responsibility of leadership, with space and freedom for each one to carry
forward our outreach, joining hands as companions in mission. I have really
experienced deep trust that has been placed in me at this stage of my
formation. This trust has helped me grow
as a person, and I believe that this confidence in me will help me in the long
run to stand firmly in my vocation, while facing any kind of challenge in any
part of the world.
Afghan Handicrafts
Last, but not the least, what I always
admire here is the aesthetic sense of the Afghans in their day today life. In
most homes that I have visited, I have found beautiful presentations of
flowers, curtains, furniture – all with matching colors. Likewise, their attractive handicrafts, such as carpets, rugs, leather
craft, traditional dresses, and many other hand-made products, have made
Afghanistan famous internationally. Afghanistan carpets and rugs are made of
silk, cotton, and wool, and are generally made by the Turkmen and Uzbek tribes,
living in northern parts of the country.
Conclusion
Today the world knows
Afghanistan only through the news channels, and when they hear the word
''Afghanistan'', all they can think of is terror. In contrast, Afghanistan is
not limited to this negative picture alone; it also has a bright side that we
often lose sight of in the media. It is a country with an incredibly rich and
glorious history. It has civilization, literature, culture, heroes, beautiful
nature, most precious historical assets, and of course people with hearts of
gold.
We
believe that with the help of the international community, particularly its
close neighbors, the eager young generation of Afghans will be able to bring
long-lasting positive change, and gradually work towards becoming a
self-sufficient and developed country in our world.
